Is the excitement you feel during a date real or is it a "suspension bridge effect" designed by the other party?

Review expert: Taozi National Psychological Counselor

In the past two years, the popularity of dating variety shows has not diminished. The handsome men and beautiful women in the shows have paired up with each other, and some of them are constantly in love, while others are extremely sweet. When every couple of guests are on a date, it is essential to experience some exciting amusement projects. The jumping machine in the amusement park, the dangerous outdoor adventure, the thrilling escape room... The relationship between the male and female guests often heats up quickly in such thrilling activities. In fact, there is a little mystery behind these dating projects - the suspension bridge effect .

What is the "suspension bridge effect"?

The term "suspension bridge effect" comes from a very interesting psychological test: researchers arranged a young lady to stand in the middle of two bridges and asked men passing by the bridge to answer questionnaires and leave their phone numbers.

The final experimental results are: men who walked on the stable, safe, and low-height bridge did not think the woman standing on the bridge was very attractive, and few of them were willing to contact her after the experiment. However, men who walked on the relatively thrilling and nervous suspension bridge were not only more willing to contact the experimenter after the experiment, but also more likely to think that the woman was attractive. The same woman in different environments had different experimental results.

In psychology, there are many tests similar to the "suspension bridge effect". This is not an accidental result. According to the empirical research of emotional psychologist Arthur Allen, dangerous or stimulating situations can promote emotions, which means that the "suspension bridge effect" is indeed a catalyst for human emotions.

Source: TV series screenshots

So why does the "suspension bridge" environment affect people's emotions?

How does the “suspension bridge effect” affect emotions?

First of all, we need to know that human emotional experience does not necessarily come from one's own actual feelings and experiences, but is based on the interpretation of one's own physiological arousal (physiological reactions accompanying emotions and feelings). Physiological arousal is an extremely complex process, involving a series of physiological activities such as the nervous system, circulatory system, and endocrine system.

This mechanism determines that it is difficult for people to accurately and efficiently find the cause of physiological arousal. Therefore, many times, we cannot tell the reason for our accelerated heartbeat. Is it the pounding heartbeat or the sudden affection caused by the first sight, or is it just a normal reaction after the stimulating activity? Therefore, many times the accelerated heartbeat will be regarded as "heartbeat", and it is easier to have a good impression of the other person.

Source: pixabay

But why do only stimulating activities produce such an effect? ​​The reason behind this is inseparable from the human physiological mechanism. When we are in an unstable and dangerous situation, the human body will release a neurostimulant called phenylethylamine . Its secretion will cause physiological phenomena such as accelerated heartbeat, rapid breathing, sweaty palms, and red face, and will also produce a feeling of extreme excitement and joy.

In order to further understand the reasons behind this physiological reaction, our brain also begins to use its "detective" ability to explain these behaviors from a cognitive level. However, due to the ambiguity of the situation and the complexity of the scene, the brain cannot give an accurate answer. It cannot answer the real reason why your heart beats faster. Therefore, many times, the brain forms a wrong attribution, that is, it mistakenly believes that the "heart-pounding" is caused by the charm and attraction of the companions.

Source: pixabay

Therefore, in addition to the suspension bridge, watching horror movies and riding roller coasters are also listed as must-do items for dating. At the same time, when people are in a dangerous environment, the sense of security and dependence of each other's company is also a powerful tool for warming up the relationship.

The psychology of dating

In addition to the suspension bridge effect, there are many interesting psychological phenomena in dating. For example, the "exposure effect" also comes from a psychologist's experiment: the researcher arranged some "research assistants" in the student classroom. Each assistant had the same duties, just sitting like a mannequin and not having any verbal communication with the students. The comparison item was that the number of times each assistant appeared was different. The final experimental results showed that the more times the assistant appeared, the higher the favorability was.

In real life, this can explain why some people "love more and more the more they see someone", and the number of times they see someone is proportional to their liking . Just like many public figures, exposure and popularity are closely related. However, the exposure effect does not mean that the more times you see someone, the deeper your feelings will be. If the initial impression is not good, exposure will not increase your favorability.

Therefore, if you want to increase your favorability through the exposure effect, you still need some skills, such as creating a relatively good first impression and creating a comfortable atmosphere for communication in subsequent meetings.

Source: unsplash

The "darkness effect" is also a hot topic in psychology, that is, in a darker place, the possibility of two people getting close to each other is much higher than in a brighter place. Different environments will bring different feelings to people. In a dark environment, people's expressions and body movements will be more relaxed, and the content of the conversation will be more real and in-depth, expressing more friendliness.

In addition, the "darkness effect" may also be the preservation of human primitive memory. Since ancient times, the night has been the most threatening environment for humans. At night, people tend to stay with their companions, so they will naturally strengthen their connections with others in the dark. However, don't think that everything will be fine if you master the darkness effect. The influence of the darkness effect is mutual. When you want to improve your charm through a dark environment on a date, you should also consider that you are also under the influence of the darkness effect.

Source: News Photo

The "bridge effect" makes people's heart beat faster, the "exposure effect" accumulates goodwill, and the "darkness effect" creates intimacy. These psychological effects have entered our lives with books, TV series, etc., and are called "dating secrets." However, no matter what effect is used, the generation of human emotions is a magical process. We can make reasonable use of these effects, but we should not forget that sincerity is the criterion for interpersonal communication .